Final Words
by Swords and Bandages
Summary: As Jiraiya departs for the Land of Rain, Tsunade notices that he dropped something... an envelope, to be exact. It is a letter addressed to her. But she was never supposed to read it, not unless he never came back. Unrequited JiraiyaxTsunade oneshot.


**a/n: I'm posting some stories that I've posted on another website previously. Most of it will be one-shots. I won't be posting a full-length story until I'm done with the one I started.**

**Feedback will be appreciated.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto.**

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Tsunade gazed on as the back of Jiraiya's figure gradually faded into the distance. She still felt warm from the effects of the liquor. A chilly wind was beginning to blow through the streets, and she was glad that she had been drinking and was able to keep herself warm.

Her semi-dreary eyes suddenly noticed a small white envelope being blown towards her on the ground. Since it came from the direction toward which Jiraiya had left, she conjectured that he had dropped it from his pocket inadvertently. It was weird what liquor could do to you, even in small amounts. That was why, in her younger days, Tsunade never, ever drunk the night before a mission.

She picked up the envelope, and examined it. It was quite unremarkable, and bore no stamp. The only mark visible upon it was the neat handwriting on the front saying:

**To Tsunade**

Tsunade was intrigued. Jiraiya never wrote any letters, at least not to her.

Remembering that she had to return to her office, she put the letter in her pocket, and walked back to the Hokage tower.

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Once she was at her desk again, and Shizune had retreated to her own office, Tsunade opened the envelope. A plain letter fell out. Unfolding it, she began reading.

_Tsunade,_

_If you're reading this, I'm dead- killed in the line of duty for my home village, my nation of birth. I don't regret it. In fact, I'm glad it turned out this way, because I know I gave my life to protect the next generation. I've no doubt that they will prosper- especially Naruto, even if he has a lot to learn before becoming Hokage. It's good that kids like him don't give up on their dreams. Life is hectic, and even though you might never achieve a dream, you must not lose faith in life._

_If they recover my body, give me a modest funeral. If not, just carve my name on the Hero Monument. It will be an honor for my name to be inscribed next to the names of the great heroes of our village, even if I may surpass some of them in fame and skill._

_But before I fade into a distant flicker in your memory, I thought that I should let you know something._

_Ever since old times, I've had my eyes on you. Sadly, I often looked at you in an indecent manner- I still remember that time when you almost killed me. Rest assured; the death blow delivered unto me would have had been much less painful than what happened that time. I used to still feel sore once in a while from it. A part of me is glad that the pain will go away as my life ends, but another part of me would not let it go. It's the only keepsake of you that I ever had. I regret the fact that I could not have kept anything more to remember you by._

_All those rejections of yours over the years did make me tougher, I suppose. I could deal with them much better. But a rejection from you was unlike any other rejection I've gotten. Those were just rough parts of the road that I could cross easily if I watched my step. Rejections from you were like true hazards on the road- a tripwire, a stone I stumble on, a large hole in the pavement… I'd have to pick myself up every time. A sigh, a roll of my eyes, and I move on again, but the shock of each subsequent fall never lessens._

_What did I feel for you? Was it love? Was it genuine affection? It doesn't matter now, when I breathe no more. I just wanted to tell you that I felt that way. It might have been better if I never told you, but I can rest easier with this off of my chest. Now, don't you cry for me, Tsunade. Instead, pour out a bit of liquor, and let the alcohol wash all your feelings away. Pour out a cup for your old pal, yours truly, and drink it for me. When you wake up, let the hangover buzz make you put everything behind you. But know this before you move on, and I become just a fond memory of times past- someday, I'll see you in a better place. Until then, I'll be watching over you whenever I can._

_To life, to courage, to love, and to peace,_

_Jiraiya_

The letter gently dropped to the desk while Tsunade stared at it. Suddenly feeling the need for more liquor, she dug out a small bottle from the bottom of a drawer, and drank straight from the bottle.


End file.
